Commitment Issues

I sit here at my desk, which has a couple shelves above it, and see 10 books lining the 2nd shelf above my laptop. I started reading about 5 of those books and got to about chapter 4 (on average) and put the book down. It wasn't that I didn't enjoy what I read, I think I just have a commitment problem with reading. If I were 11 years old someone would probably diagnose me (along with all of my other peers who were lazy like me) with ADHD and throw some aderol down my throat twice a day. No it's not ADHD, but rather I truly think I have a problem committing to certain endeavors.

If I miss one appointment with the dentist for example, I have the hardest time rescheduling. I feel like just changing dentists all together and calling it a new day. I once got too busy to keep up my regular schedule of visiting the Chiropractor I was seeing. The receptionist would call to reschedule and let me know I had missed my appointment. I ignored the calls and switched to a different Chiropractor a couple months later. Why?! I'd hate if someone did that to me. Couldn't make an appointment with me and then just switched Realtors rather than saying "oh i got busy, let's try again."

I tend to just back slowly away from things once I get far enough along that it starts to become routine and I've either A.) tired of the routine or B.) missed a couple treatments/chapters/days/appointments. Starting back up again seems like a lot of effort, after all.

It's a sheer wonder that I've been taking Spanish classes once a week for the past few months and have continued to do so. Usually I get about, well.. four chapters into something, and think "eh, that was fun but NEXT!" I don't know that this necessarily spills over into people and relationships. Who am I kidding, it does. "That was fun, but mehh. NEXT!" I wonder what the conversion would be from chapters into weeks or months in that scenario. I'm guessing 4 chapters in my book commitment world equals something along the lines of 5 months in time for interpersonal relationships.

Speaking of, someone just told me today "I still think of you often, especially when I see your name in my phone." All I could respond with was "..that'll do it!" I mean seriously? I think of you 'every time I see your name in my phone' ?? No shit, Sherlock, that's like saying apples cross my mind every time I eat one.

What were we talking about? Oh well, who cares.
This was fun but.. NEXT!
M.db